We hear so often that we should love and care, be thoughtful, empathise etc etc.from church, from leaders and from practically everybody who thinks they can advice. I agree. The world needs more of that.
They also go one step further to tell you how to care , how to show that you love and the steps to take to show that you are a friend again etc etc. Yes, I also agree.
But hardly do I hear of someone telling one very important fact if not the most important point. That is...
to love and care sincerely from the heart.
All that we can do can be done because we should and we must. Maybe because of the role we play. Maybe we are parents. Christians, role models, friends and leaders.
But if it not done right ultimately I feel it negates things and even worsen the relationship when it is not done from the heart. Nothing irritates me more than a weak handshake and a quick glance as I pass by. It makes me feel as if I was just in the way of their duty. I rather just go without the handshake just not to receive the vibes. If we do care, do take a few seconds more to look at me in the eyes and give me a smile from the heart that says I truly am glad to see you. Sorry to say that I feel that at a place that I go every week. (Don't get me wrong, not that it only happens there BUT rather that is the place where I interact most with other people as I am now a retiree) I would rather they give me a smile, look at me at the eyes and maybe a nod.A weak handshake gives me the message' OK so you are here, now go so that I can say hi to the next guy' .It doesn't give the warmth that it was meant to be and maybe that is where it has failed.It was meant to make others feel welcome but if it is not done well, it will negates everything else. Making someone feel welcome is not the words 'welcome' and words like 'sorry if I didn't show or do it' has lost it purpose because it is already done, like it or mean it or not.
I feel so sad that those involved just do not understand that when one truly feels and care and love, one do not really need the steps or ways to show it. Your body language, your very action shows it. You will emits the feelings and the vibes. I was never thought to love and care but I am sure my students and friends knew that I do.
Bottom line is when you want to love, sincerely love and care otherwise the recipient will know.Otherwise please do not try to care and love. It emits an uncomfortable aura.
I guess I am lucky that I need not pretend but then I have never wanted or need to pretend. I always avoid people I don't particularly feel 'loving' to. And then again others may view that as my negative point and that was my downfall 5 years ago. That was when I allowed politics to take over my career and cut it short.But then again I say, I had no regrets.
My God love first and I pray that more (including myself) could grow to be more like Him
2 comments:
Hi Kuzhai!
How are you? =)
God-incidentally prayed this reading this morning, things you already know i think! But hope He speaks to you even more deeply through it.
St Augustine's tractates on St John: The twin commandments of love
"The Lord himself came, the Teacher of love, full of love, shortening the word upon the earth, as it was foretold that he would do. He showed that from the two precepts of love depend the whole of the Law and the prophets.
What are these two commandments? Join me, my brethren, in recollecting them. They ought to be thoroughly familiar to you and not just come into your mind when we recite them: they ought never to be blotted out from your hearts. Always and everywhere, bear in mind that you must love God and your neighbour, love God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind; and love your neighbour as you would love yourself.
We must always ponder these words, meditate them, hold them in our minds, practise them and bring them to fruition. As far as teaching is concerned, the love of God comes first; but as far as doing is concerned, the love of our neighbour comes first. Whoever sets out to teach you these two commandments of love must not commend your neighbour to you first, and then God, but God first and then your neighbour. You, on the other hand, do not yet see God, but loving your neighbour will bring you that sight. By loving your neighbour you purify your eyes so that they are ready to see God, as John clearly says: If you do not love your brother, whom you see, how can you love God, whom you do not see?
You are told “Love God”. If you say to me “Show me whom I should love”, what can I say except what John says? No man has ever seen God. But you must not think yourself wholly unsuited to seeing God: God is love, says John, and whoever dwells in love dwells in God. So love whoever is nearest to you and look inside you to see where that love is coming from: thus, as far as you are capable, you will see God.
So start to love your neighbout. Share your bread with the hungry, bring the homeless pauper into your house. Clothe the naked, and do not despise the servants of your kin.
What will you get from doing all this? Your light will break forth like the dawn. Your light is your God, your dawn, because he will come to you to end the night of this world — he who, himself, neither rises nor sets but is eternal.
By loving your neighbour, by having care for your neighbour, you are travelling on a journey. Where are you journeying, except to the Lord God, whom we must love with all our heart and all our soul and all our mind? We have not yet reached the Lord, but our neighbour is with us already. So support your neighbour, who is travelling with you, so that you may reach him with whom you long to dwell."
yes, it brings in deeper thought. PTL.may we love more from the heart and may He move more hearts towards His will.
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