On numerous occasions, I had been asked how do one know when one has found the right one. Obviously, that question did not come from my contemporaries. It came from the younger generation when they came visiting or over coffee and cake on an outing.
I have always believe that when one has met the right one ,one will know. That is because first and foremost, you will want to spend all your free time with the other party.Next you will enjoy her company(I will from now on assume the question is from a guy but it goes the same way with a girl). You will love to tell her your life story and you will want to know every detail of her life too.You will want do things that pleases her and try to understand her preferences.All this is the first level.
The next level is when her bad or undesirable habits is acceptable.You will accept and not compromise.You will want to give and not expect it to be returned. She will be the one whose opinion will matter.
Thirdly, it must be two ways. No relationship will go far if it is unidirectional. As a matter of fact learn to accept that there will be times when you care but it is not reciprocated. At that instant, please sit back and ponder. There is no right or wrong, should or shouldn't in a long term relationship. There is only...if it is the right one.
To take the plunge,one must do so with the understanding that it is forever.In all relationships, there will be quarrels and squabbles as time goes by. They are temporary.You WILL get back together. There should not be any doubt about that. And both must subscribe to this belief.
Keeping a relationship alive needs working on. Things do not just happen. There are times you need to show and re enforce.More important it takes TWO.
All this is but a tip of the ice-cream tub(as in iceberg for something negative). One can write volumes on the topic but then love is something to eujoy and not learned. Last word is, I personally believe you will know. Matthew and me prove that didn't we? We just celebrated our 24th wedding anniversary yesterday and we are blessed with the loveliest of children and a warm family. I love you, Matthew.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
missing in action
So I made another mistake.On retirement, it does not mean I will have more time to write. I had been a bit too ambitious.
There had been so many things that I had wanted to do for so long. I started packing my school stuff, clearing the computer files, packing home stuff, bought my cloth for patchwork, started to clean my kitchen took out the books I wanted to read, enjoy library etc etc. I think I should be more patient and take things one at a time. Otherwise I will be having a lorry load of unfinished projects by year end.
Just called up a school too. Now I have to come up with a resume if I want to go back to work.Edmund is on holiday and since his holidays are so limited, I also want to spend time with him.Had a long list of things to share with him too.
Mother in law not well for the last one week. All that didn't help.
Not forgetting I also want to get started with my social work.
Arrrrgh........................... I had to be careful otherwise I will be back to square one just like school days. But again the difference is that I love every minute of it now.It is like going from distill water to ice-cream!
There had been so many things that I had wanted to do for so long. I started packing my school stuff, clearing the computer files, packing home stuff, bought my cloth for patchwork, started to clean my kitchen took out the books I wanted to read, enjoy library etc etc. I think I should be more patient and take things one at a time. Otherwise I will be having a lorry load of unfinished projects by year end.
Just called up a school too. Now I have to come up with a resume if I want to go back to work.Edmund is on holiday and since his holidays are so limited, I also want to spend time with him.Had a long list of things to share with him too.
Mother in law not well for the last one week. All that didn't help.
Not forgetting I also want to get started with my social work.
Arrrrgh........................... I had to be careful otherwise I will be back to square one just like school days. But again the difference is that I love every minute of it now.It is like going from distill water to ice-cream!
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
ex-student's wedding
I told myself that as I leave the school scene, I should blog on other interests like motherhood, wife hood(ha ha ha not only can I use foul language, I can also use bad English.But I think it is not a good habit to cultivate.!)and so much more out there.
but I have to go back on my own promise and say something on PH's wedding on 07.07.07.
Ex-student PH visited me last year sometime around August to let me know that he is getting married this year. I didn't know that one need to book dates a year ahead before one's marriage! A year before I married M, it didn't even cross my mind that I will marry him.(now I am going to get it from you know who ha ha ha) Anyway so my diary was block a year ago.
Come last month, the invitation came. Last week I wasn't sure if I will be there for his church ceremony feeling a bit out of place. Cut the story short, I went and I felt nostalgic. The very child I disciplined, scolded, talked to is now a married man.We talked about career, girls, courtship and what no ts.This new year, he even brought R to meet me and now they are standing there bride and groom.
As he hug me when I enter the hall, once again I knew why I never regretted the career a chose 32 years ago.
That night at the dinner, met up with numerous ex students too.As I stood in the middle of the photos, I felt like a mother hen with her brood! The hugs they gave me and the words of thanks they showered on me made me feel so special. They wanted to share their success and let me know that they have not failed me.
To all of you there that night , your success if my success. Your happiness is my happiness. Like I said it, I may not remember your names, but I could remember all the time we spend together.I recognised KK by his voice and mannerism!
Postscript...The next few days as the news of my retirement spread, more messages of congratulations came in.
To PH and R, have an awesome life together.I felt good as I witness your wedding.To the rest, thank you for the memories.
but I have to go back on my own promise and say something on PH's wedding on 07.07.07.
Ex-student PH visited me last year sometime around August to let me know that he is getting married this year. I didn't know that one need to book dates a year ahead before one's marriage! A year before I married M, it didn't even cross my mind that I will marry him.(now I am going to get it from you know who ha ha ha) Anyway so my diary was block a year ago.
Come last month, the invitation came. Last week I wasn't sure if I will be there for his church ceremony feeling a bit out of place. Cut the story short, I went and I felt nostalgic. The very child I disciplined, scolded, talked to is now a married man.We talked about career, girls, courtship and what no ts.This new year, he even brought R to meet me and now they are standing there bride and groom.
As he hug me when I enter the hall, once again I knew why I never regretted the career a chose 32 years ago.
That night at the dinner, met up with numerous ex students too.As I stood in the middle of the photos, I felt like a mother hen with her brood! The hugs they gave me and the words of thanks they showered on me made me feel so special. They wanted to share their success and let me know that they have not failed me.
To all of you there that night , your success if my success. Your happiness is my happiness. Like I said it, I may not remember your names, but I could remember all the time we spend together.I recognised KK by his voice and mannerism!
Postscript...The next few days as the news of my retirement spread, more messages of congratulations came in.
To PH and R, have an awesome life together.I felt good as I witness your wedding.To the rest, thank you for the memories.
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
maiden photo blogging
Photos of my last day in school
The HM that brought back a smile to my face and make life bearable for the last 4 months
A good friend that has to make an impromptu speech at the last minute but it was BEAUTIFUL
A LOVELY gesture from friends I made ONLY over 4 months. Now I know why God send me there.
To-be-Guru-guru cemerlang of 2017
Good friends
Chatting mates for 4 months
I love you all
supporting staff
men of the school
you are ok.
A lovely pair of dangling earrings from the students of the school chosen by the biggest boy of the school!
The group whom I could close both eyes and just crap!(Wow See, I could use foul language now!)
1976 UM orientation roommate reunited as helpful supportive afternoon supervisor.
Happy birthday to you(Sweet 18?)
Good buddy system, don't you think so?
The HM that brought back a smile to my face and make life bearable for the last 4 months
A good friend that has to make an impromptu speech at the last minute but it was BEAUTIFUL
A LOVELY gesture from friends I made ONLY over 4 months. Now I know why God send me there.
To-be-Guru-guru cemerlang of 2017
Good friends
Chatting mates for 4 months
I love you all
supporting staff 
men of the school
you are ok.
A lovely pair of dangling earrings from the students of the school chosen by the biggest boy of the school!
The group whom I could close both eyes and just crap!(Wow See, I could use foul language now!)
1976 UM orientation roommate reunited as helpful supportive afternoon supervisor.
Happy birthday to you(Sweet 18?)
Good buddy system, don't you think so?
looking for an answer
Last weekend followed hubby to a wedding bersanding. Met up with quite a few of his old old colleagues.Chat with R got me thinking again about a question that has been on my mind.let me give you a few kisah benar first.
case 1
husband and wife are teachers. have 2 lovely smart daughters. Eldest wanted to do medicine (and any parents can tell you that will mean RM1000000 for an external degree.) Parent consented to daughter going to UK with the promise that she will help daughter no 2 when the time comes.7 years later. daughter no 1 come back converted to Christianity. Church tell her that all her earnings go to church. church will give pocket money to her. parents devastated. 2nd daughter studies put on halt.
case 2.
Student went oversea to study. good quiet sweet girl with practically no flaws(she was my student. I know). Converted overseas. Gave maximum money to church. survived practically on coffee and instant mee for a year. Come end of course. church say her church work not completed. so to keep her there one more year why don't she fail and repeat. Girl did that. parents don't know a thing.
case 3.
working parents retire. son wants to do a 7 years course. parents gave gratuity to him. since he is a good boy. son finish course, did another year in bible college. decided to leave the degree and do missionary work in east m'sia. Parents eyes are red from crying because now they have to work in their 60's to support themselves. Other Christians tell them they are lucky because the family will be blessed.
case 4
christian elder don't like L. tell another elder that L is possessed. Elder number 2 came under the pretence of praying for L but actually checking if L is possessed.Where is privacy act?
case 5
K is only son to elderly parents.(non convert) Son go on mission trip. Come back and tell parents he is not going back to work. Going to do missionary work at 3rd world.
Questions
1.does the name of religion gives someone the authority to act like God?
2. Who are religious leaders to decides the route a young man takes without regards to his or her background.
3. Is one statement like Your family will be bless, It is your calling, God will take care of things for you, have trust in Him... sufficient to covers every thing?
4. Is this Christianity? or is it man's interpretation of Christianity.
I am sorry if I am opening a can of worms and inviting trouble but sincerely, I have my doubts
My idea of the faith is to help others. be there when they need you, bring some peace and love into the world. do no harm and definitely not pain and tears.Go about with a pure sincere heart, love all irregardless of faith Then God will guide you.If life dish out lemons to you, God will show you how to make lemonade BUT definitely I am not the one to throw the lemons at you.
case 1
husband and wife are teachers. have 2 lovely smart daughters. Eldest wanted to do medicine (and any parents can tell you that will mean RM1000000 for an external degree.) Parent consented to daughter going to UK with the promise that she will help daughter no 2 when the time comes.7 years later. daughter no 1 come back converted to Christianity. Church tell her that all her earnings go to church. church will give pocket money to her. parents devastated. 2nd daughter studies put on halt.
case 2.
Student went oversea to study. good quiet sweet girl with practically no flaws(she was my student. I know). Converted overseas. Gave maximum money to church. survived practically on coffee and instant mee for a year. Come end of course. church say her church work not completed. so to keep her there one more year why don't she fail and repeat. Girl did that. parents don't know a thing.
case 3.
working parents retire. son wants to do a 7 years course. parents gave gratuity to him. since he is a good boy. son finish course, did another year in bible college. decided to leave the degree and do missionary work in east m'sia. Parents eyes are red from crying because now they have to work in their 60's to support themselves. Other Christians tell them they are lucky because the family will be blessed.
case 4
christian elder don't like L. tell another elder that L is possessed. Elder number 2 came under the pretence of praying for L but actually checking if L is possessed.Where is privacy act?
case 5
K is only son to elderly parents.(non convert) Son go on mission trip. Come back and tell parents he is not going back to work. Going to do missionary work at 3rd world.
Questions
1.does the name of religion gives someone the authority to act like God?
2. Who are religious leaders to decides the route a young man takes without regards to his or her background.
3. Is one statement like Your family will be bless, It is your calling, God will take care of things for you, have trust in Him... sufficient to covers every thing?
4. Is this Christianity? or is it man's interpretation of Christianity.
I am sorry if I am opening a can of worms and inviting trouble but sincerely, I have my doubts
My idea of the faith is to help others. be there when they need you, bring some peace and love into the world. do no harm and definitely not pain and tears.Go about with a pure sincere heart, love all irregardless of faith Then God will guide you.If life dish out lemons to you, God will show you how to make lemonade BUT definitely I am not the one to throw the lemons at you.
post retirement!!! what is the difference
Phew! So many asked how is life after retirement? Well.... I haven't started to enjoy it yet. I have approximately 20+ things that I need to look into as soon as possible. But this morning after my morning walk(yeah yeah yeah I am going back to my walking at the desa park every morning after I send off M and Ad.The whole routine takes approximately 50 minutes but hope to increase it as time goes by.) I decided to go into my blog.
I guess that is the difference between pre and post retirement. I no longer need to think and plan my days so that the office runs well. so that the teachers get their letters in time, so that the syllabus is finished, letters are send out according to datelines, projects are organised well with minimum flaws. I do things as I feel like it except for the fact that as for now, I have so many things I have to do!!!
In school I have started and redo the filing system 3 times. A a matter of fact it was the last but one project(implemented on 1.6.07} before I got to go!I had to start from scratch the first time and subsequently follow certain guidelines given out. overall I still need to plan and see to it that enough files are opened but not too many to burden the people concern. But do you know that the documents in my house is a mess. I remembered M saying once that one of the things that attracted him was the systematic way in which I keep things.He loves going through things and his idea of packing is bringing everything out on the floor and asking me what are they. THEN his job is finish! I have to do the rest. Anyway back to present day, I NEED to do something to the tons of documents lying every where in the house. It has been a mess for too long.
Next, every morning in school before 8 I try to see to all letters.Carefully forward them to the respective teachers (got to select them with a reason otherwise cannot answer when they ask why they have to do it.) Next got to see that the teacher is not required to do multiple tasks at the same time. Then I record the letters to the diary and the teachers assigned then I put out the pile to the office to be given out. letters which need immediate attention like meetings in 1 day's time, I will put the word SEGERA not forgetting letters that need HM's personal attention or advice, I will take them out and see him myself...... back to home, everyday I open the letters, glance thro them to find out where they came from,(sometimes I don't even open them when I know what their rough contend is!!!) then I will put it back into the envelopes and happily put it on hubby's table. sometimes he see sometimes they got lost.! another habit i better bring home from school before we get into trouble with the authorities
so you think you are free... retired with no income.... Yes. FREE definitely not at least not for sometime but the difference is I am only answerable to myself. now that is the difference
I guess that is the difference between pre and post retirement. I no longer need to think and plan my days so that the office runs well. so that the teachers get their letters in time, so that the syllabus is finished, letters are send out according to datelines, projects are organised well with minimum flaws. I do things as I feel like it except for the fact that as for now, I have so many things I have to do!!!
In school I have started and redo the filing system 3 times. A a matter of fact it was the last but one project(implemented on 1.6.07} before I got to go!I had to start from scratch the first time and subsequently follow certain guidelines given out. overall I still need to plan and see to it that enough files are opened but not too many to burden the people concern. But do you know that the documents in my house is a mess. I remembered M saying once that one of the things that attracted him was the systematic way in which I keep things.He loves going through things and his idea of packing is bringing everything out on the floor and asking me what are they. THEN his job is finish! I have to do the rest. Anyway back to present day, I NEED to do something to the tons of documents lying every where in the house. It has been a mess for too long.
Next, every morning in school before 8 I try to see to all letters.Carefully forward them to the respective teachers (got to select them with a reason otherwise cannot answer when they ask why they have to do it.) Next got to see that the teacher is not required to do multiple tasks at the same time. Then I record the letters to the diary and the teachers assigned then I put out the pile to the office to be given out. letters which need immediate attention like meetings in 1 day's time, I will put the word SEGERA not forgetting letters that need HM's personal attention or advice, I will take them out and see him myself...... back to home, everyday I open the letters, glance thro them to find out where they came from,(sometimes I don't even open them when I know what their rough contend is!!!) then I will put it back into the envelopes and happily put it on hubby's table. sometimes he see sometimes they got lost.! another habit i better bring home from school before we get into trouble with the authorities
so you think you are free... retired with no income.... Yes. FREE definitely not at least not for sometime but the difference is I am only answerable to myself. now that is the difference
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