I don't want

i just spend nearly two hours with Audrey won the Skype and I can't speak a word. That is not what I want. This is ridiculous!
I go in to bath and as I rub shampoo, I only felt hair on my hand. It is so dramatic but I can't say anything.
I came out and daddy prayed for me but I feel so void. Ed hold my hands and I feel nothing in my mind.
I just want to collapse into a hole and stay there.i want to go to sleep and sleep through it and if it never ends, I don't want to wake up
Stay positive stay positive stay positive. But how to stay positive.
I am not sure if I am having constipation but really nothing much is coming out. What comes out is not hard but really can't push
No appetite no nothing. Can I just stare and have no relation.that is exactly how I feel. Nothing