Mother and daughter

I was talking to my sweetie pie as she pack from her present place to move to her new place . She also need to pack to come back home for two months. Boxes have to be send to her new place , new apartment need to be found,work is still going on and she has to decide not only how but also what to pack to go where. My heart goes out to her as I could feel her thoughts and the decisions that she has to make. As a mum, my heart aches for her and wishes so much that I could be there to help. I obviously can't as I am thousands of kilometres away from my little baby

So what could I do but to ask questions and comments as I watch helplessly.

Her reaction to my actions was that I was checking on and evaluating her capability in finishing the tasks ahead. Obviously I know she was wrong in her thoughts. I am not angry as my heart still goes out to her.

But it brought me to realise that it has been a recurring happening with my children when many a times, they felt that I was testing them, analysing and judging them. I did some soul searching. I realised that their words and feelings are identical to those I said and felt when I was the daughter. I felt the same way and uttered the same words with my mum years ago.

My next thought is why it happened. I tried to remember why I  felt that way and why I said those words. I then realised that I had always wanted to be the child my mum would be proud off. I always felt that I couldn't attain the standard she had set for me. That is why I always felt that she is belittling me and checking on me. I now realised that they were actually actions stem from concern and love for me. She wasn't judging but was trying to help in her own helpless way. Back to the future, I now need to stem out the wrong message send out. I need to think about how I should express my love without stressing them out. What different words should I use, how should I approach the situation in future.